Create a goal that you can achieve in three days and discuss why it is important.
In my never-ending quest for self-love, knowledge and compassion I have begun to realize that relaxation is something I sorely lack. I have been trying to foster more relaxation in my life, going so far as to attempting to learn to meditate. While some people can naturally find that calm space in themselves, I struggle with it. For some reason I can’t seem to get my head around how you stop your thoughts and maintain a serene state of mind while focusing on nothing. Needless to say, meditation has been a real challenge for me. Although I have been practising both meditation and deep relaxation breathing for a few months, I still haven’t reached a state of deep relaxation, regardless of the varied methods I have tried. But I will keep on trying. If millions of other people can do it, why can’t I?
I think I have mentioned before that I have a depressive mechanism (thought pattern) that keeps me mired to the hopeless spot I find myself in by constantly telling myself that while something might be good or work well for others, it won’t work for me. I think that this thought pattern may be at work when I try to meditate or relax. I don’t think I really believe that meditation or deep relaxation is possible for me.
I am hoping to counter this thought pattern my setting goals. In setting goals I hope to give myself a sense of achievement, something I can be proud of even if the something seems rather minute to others. All that matters in setting these goals for myself is that it is something I believe in and want to accomplish for myself alone. I have read various articles on goal setting and the method that is both the simplest and seems the most worthwhile to me is the S.M.A.R.T. method. It is actually kinda brilliant in it’s simplicity. Basically when making goals you have to make sure that the goal is Specific, it should be as defined and detailed as possible with no generalizations; Measurable, so you can track your progress and definitively see results; Attainable, otherwise it will just be discouraging and an act of self-defeat and futility; Relevant, it has to mean something to you or you won’t be motivated to achieve it; Time Sensitive, there needs to be a time line and a point where you have successfully achieved one goal and can move on to the next, which is why you break bigger future goals into smaller time-sensitive ones.
With all this in mind, my goal for the next three days is: To spend five minutes practising meditation and ten minutes practising deep relaxation every day. I will record each session, one in the morning and one in the evening, in my Wellness Journal. Within one week I will increase each practice by five minutes. To combat the thoughts of either not working for me I will acknowledge the thought, smile at it like I would a child and ask, “Why ever would I think I wasn’t worthy of what every other human being is? What makes me so un-special?” Then I will lovingly let it go and go back to what I am focusing on.
Attainable: Very! It will only take twenty minutes a day, broken up into two sessions. There are no physical limitations or pain control issues.
The first step to change for me is recognizing what needs to change and consciously acknowledging when I engage in the behaviours that keep me bound in depressive thought patterns. Hopefully over the next few days I will be able to recognize when I employ this depressive mechanism in relation to meditation and relaxation and in turn I will be able to cut off the thoughts before they taint my view of the feasibility of either working for me. Because, after all, why would I be any different from anyone else? I am just as worthy and deserving of moments of peace and tranquillity.
Here’s hoping that I can maintain this positive outlook over the next few days!